A friend named Scott

I have this friend named Scott. Or maybe friend is the wrong word. Whatever he is to me, he has been part of my life now since 1999, in an on and off again friendship. He's from the part of my lifetime when I was very very into BDSM. He came into my life one night when I was on AOL looking at profiles. I liked his screen name and loved his profile so I sent him an IM and started talking with him. We talked for more than an hour that first night. He's a musician, a guitarist, and he's in a few different bands. I fell for his words, the way he strung his thoughts together in his writings.

Later that fall, I got the chance to meet him. He was coming to CA, to bring a guitar or two to a guy in Long Beach that he trusted to fix them. He ended up spending a couple of nights where I lived at that time. The last night he was there, my power had been shut off. We'd gone to pick up his guitars earlier that day and he played some tunes in the candlelight. I had a blast listening to him play. The next day, he left. I managed to take one picture of him, using a Polaroid camera I had. I have no idea where that picture is today, but I remember it vividly.

I did see him again, a few months later. Still a great guy, still magical with his words and guitar. About 3 months after seeing him again, I ended up behind bars for 13 months. Somewhere during that time, the pull his words had on me lessened a bit. After I got out, I tried to see him again but he had things to do and people to be with and scheduling time, even a few hours, was nearly impossible. My interest in BDSM waned, and his words no longer pulled me in. I would see him online every now and then, say hi, let him know what was going on in my life and ask what was going on in his. The distance grew.

Right now, he's in a fight against cancer. A growth near his shoulder that hadn't caused problems before started causing them now. He had it removed April 2010 and it grew back. The biopsy showed cancer. He went for radiation and it wasn't the success they'd hoped for. As of now, there's a tumor in his lung and he's in the hospital because he couldn't breathe. No news for the last few days but that's not always a bad thing.

I'm hoping he stays positive, keeps fear at a far distance, and believes he will be fine. I can't say what will happen to him. I haven't seen him in 11 years. I will continue to send positive energy his way. What I keep thinking of is the song For Good, from the musical Wicked. The very first stanza kinda describes how I think of him now. For those who don't know it, here it is.

I've heard it said that people come into our lives for a reason, bringing something we must learn, and we are led to those who help us most of all, if we let them, and we help them in return.

I was led to him for a reason. I'm not quite sure what it is but I'm glad he was a part of my life then and I wish him all the best now. Get well, Scott. You are needed.